The "Glamorous" Life of Auditions - 47, 48 & 49 (
Audition #55, #56, #57 & #58 )
How do you keep moving on after being riddled with deaths - 5 for me this year, all super close to me in some way - baby steps! This year has been my most trying of times, from losing no one in my inner circle to being trampled upon by life every few months in 2018. I couldn't seem to get back into a natural swing because each time I started to, someone else had to be celebrated. My heart aches at 2018 and I felt myself shutting down, some artistically, some personally. I just wanted to be alone for the most part, which is my safe space and one I tried to only give myself moments of...why? Because that's how I deal with pain...I like to hurt alone, cry by myself, deal with whatever and see if my being can pull it back together, pull me back to center by listening to what it is I truly need. No outside influences, just me trying to hear my intuition and give my soul all the room that's needed to realign. Those years of martial arts taught me that it is me and only me that can heal the insides of me with focus, determination and love. I didn't pursue art but it still randomly would pop up and I'd give my best go but nothing seemed to click this year in ways of a "traditional" booking...however, I've shot some things, I've been in the room quite a bit with little to no effort, have had repeat casting offices call me back and auditioned for more interesting roles this year than any other year so far - from series regulars, to contract roles, to being one or one of the few POC in the room getting seen.
SOMETIMES YOU SOW....we as artists must remind ourselves of that because we're so use to the dry spell that when we hit a heavy run like I've had the last few years, it feels like a screeching halt when the "work bookings" aren't flowing in. During the "droughts," we lay down seeds with our auditions, our constant bombardments of submissions and growing as an artist by doing some worthy freebies in our art, taking a few classes or growing as an artist by trying something new like voice over work. Building characters by auditioning outside our box even when we know we're not the norm - gotta love going from crazy, 80's dressing gal, to a surviving horror, cleavage showing kickass, to a strong wife then happy, normal commercial type! We've been here before, we'll probably be here again, it's how you recognize these moments that will help shape your career. Do you lose it? Do you get into the bad because hell, that's the route most artists go? Or do you reinvent? Make something new out of the old? Repurpose? These choices are yours and yours alone but you must understand that this business has you riding high for moments and then sinking to the depths of lows the next. Prep now, get use to this cycle now so you know exactly what to do when it hits...there's no panic, life moves on and you must art because that's what we do. We sow in the down time, to gather in the next cycle and reap when it's time...get good at sowing, even during the pain, the sadness, the hurt, the anger...if an audition comes up, you prepare, you work it and you go, especially if it's something that speaks to your heart or just something you need to do. You'll find yourself more connected, more aware, more in the moment and it won't be about delivering it in a way you may think they need to see it but by the realness of the moment that you're in - that's beautiful, that's art and that's yours and yours alone. I let some things go, I attended to the few things I wanted and I survived with healing because I allowed myself the space to do so while still being present in this moment. Taking time out for me, getting back into my workout routine and being/sharing on social media when I felt like it gave me the time I needed. There's no rush...we're talking about your spirit here, allow it the room to just be and it'll let you know exactly what it needs. More movies to escape - do that. More walks in the park - go for it. More home cooked meals - fix them. More time with loving animals, rubbing wolf belly or selfies with a fennec - there are places to go, like Animal Tracks! Less noise and chatter - quiet it all but it's on you to figure out the healing method necessary and most effective for your soul. And all the while I sowed...submitted when I felt it was powerful enough, auditioned when it was good enough for my art and showed up when my presence was requested. It was everything I could do and still hold it together...so I keep sprinkling those seeds about, giving myself enough time to prepare because my mind wanders a bit more now and giving myself the encouragement that they may not want me this time, but they're gonna want/need me the next. Life goes on...it's up to you how you answer that but understand you've got strength from those that believed in you, the love that only they gave to you and the knowing that they wanted to see you be in the place that you were passionate about - so don't give up/give in, it's time to go after it all that much harder!
Premieres happen and no matter how much I want to avoid them, it's important for me to show up and get better at them!!! It's hard talking off the cuff to strangers, it gives me so much anxiety but in this business, it's a part of the business as my beast keeps reminding me. My 2nd actual major premiere, so I decided to do calming, methodical things to gear up and see if that helped this time around...treating myself like a pampered pooch was a nice touch and it's official, it's a ritual now! Facial to know I'm looking my best with all the picture taking ( $33 for an organic facial, ) nails to feel like I'm armored up with pretty ( $20 at my local spot ) and a massage to free up some fear tensions ( $25 for a full hour during the early bird special 9a-1p at my favorite Emperor Leisure Spa ) which made this all so much more fun even on a budget! "Runnin' From My Roots" is a faith based film with debuts from Janelle Author of "American Idol" as the lead and Nia Sioux - also known as Nia Frasier of "Dance Moms." Lots of beautiful duets with Deanna Carter and cameos from some familiar soap stars make this movie as sweet as pie. Loved being on set because the casting director who also is the director ( Gabrielle Evans ) of our bits thanked us profusely for being there, being patient and being artists. I was literally booked off my self submission - it doesn't happen often, but it does happen guys, so don't knock doing them no matter how you may feel about them! They're the future and they're making our lives easier in ways! During this time, I only had a couple of lines to get out but during filming not only did I have to say my stuff, there was an opportunity presented when they decided to do some random rolling of the camera to get some "extra" stuff while they showed us milling about. I was asked to just talk through it since it made sense for my character being a media reporter and talk I did. I improv'd a whole bit on the spot talking to my "watchers" and guess what - not only did it make the cut, I opened the film while the other regular lines got cut. Improv guys and understand the art of acting - make sure you know who you're playing, why you're playing them and what you've got to say besides your requested lines, you never know when a chance moment will help you make it in the film. I was the last guest to walk the red carpet so although I tried to avoid some spots, I still got captured and had a great conversation with the last interviewer making the walk of dread so much fun! 🎉 Now who was the good girl and deserves that well earned celebratory din din
How do you keep moving on after being riddled with deaths - 5 for me this year, all super close to me in some way - baby steps! This year has been my most trying of times, from losing no one in my inner circle to being trampled upon by life every few months in 2018. I couldn't seem to get back into a natural swing because each time I started to, someone else had to be celebrated. My heart aches at 2018 and I felt myself shutting down, some artistically, some personally. I just wanted to be alone for the most part, which is my safe space and one I tried to only give myself moments of...why? Because that's how I deal with pain...I like to hurt alone, cry by myself, deal with whatever and see if my being can pull it back together, pull me back to center by listening to what it is I truly need. No outside influences, just me trying to hear my intuition and give my soul all the room that's needed to realign. Those years of martial arts taught me that it is me and only me that can heal the insides of me with focus, determination and love. I didn't pursue art but it still randomly would pop up and I'd give my best go but nothing seemed to click this year in ways of a "traditional" booking...however, I've shot some things, I've been in the room quite a bit with little to no effort, have had repeat casting offices call me back and auditioned for more interesting roles this year than any other year so far - from series regulars, to contract roles, to being one or one of the few POC in the room getting seen. SOMETIMES YOU SOW....we as artists must remind ourselves of that because we're so use to the dry spell that when we hit a heavy run like I've had the last few years, it feels like a screeching halt when the "work bookings" aren't flowing in. During the "droughts," we lay down seeds with our auditions, our constant bombardments of submissions and growing as an artist by doing some worthy freebies in our art, taking a few classes or growing as an artist by trying something new like voice over work. Building characters by auditioning outside our box even when we know we're not the norm - gotta love going from crazy, 80's dressing gal, to a surviving horror, cleavage showing kickass, to a strong wife then happy, normal commercial type! We've been here before, we'll probably be here again, it's how you recognize these moments that will help shape your career. Do you lose it? Do you get into the bad because hell, that's the route most artists go? Or do you reinvent? Make something new out of the old? Repurpose? These choices are yours and yours alone but you must understand that this business has you riding high for moments and then sinking to the depths of lows the next. Prep now, get use to this cycle now so you know exactly what to do when it hits...there's no panic, life moves on and you must art because that's what we do. We sow in the down time, to gather in the next cycle and reap when it's time...get good at sowing, even during the pain, the sadness, the hurt, the anger...if an audition comes up, you prepare, you work it and you go, especially if it's something that speaks to your heart or just something you need to do. You'll find yourself more connected, more aware, more in the moment and it won't be about delivering it in a way you may think they need to see it but by the realness of the moment that you're in - that's beautiful, that's art and that's yours and yours alone. I let some things go, I attended to the few things I wanted and I survived with healing because I allowed myself the space to do so while still being present in this moment. Taking time out for me, getting back into my workout routine and being/sharing on social media when I felt like it gave me the time I needed. There's no rush...we're talking about your spirit here, allow it the room to just be and it'll let you know exactly what it needs. More movies to escape - do that. More walks in the park - go for it. More home cooked meals - fix them. More time with loving animals, rubbing wolf belly or selfies with a fennec - there are places to go, like Animal Tracks! Less noise and chatter - quiet it all but it's on you to figure out the healing method necessary and most effective for your soul. And all the while I sowed...submitted when I felt it was powerful enough, auditioned when it was good enough for my art and showed up when my presence was requested. It was everything I could do and still hold it together...so I keep sprinkling those seeds about, giving myself enough time to prepare because my mind wanders a bit more now and giving myself the encouragement that they may not want me this time, but they're gonna want/need me the next. Life goes on...it's up to you how you answer that but understand you've got strength from those that believed in you, the love that only they gave to you and the knowing that they wanted to see you be in the place that you were passionate about - so don't give up/give in, it's time to go after it all that much harder!
Premieres happen and no matter how much I want to avoid them, it's important for me to show up and get better at them!!! It's hard talking off the cuff to strangers, it gives me so much anxiety but in this business, it's a part of the business as my beast keeps reminding me. My 2nd actual major premiere, so I decided to do calming, methodical things to gear up and see if that helped this time around...treating myself like a pampered pooch was a nice touch and it's official, it's a ritual now! Facial to know I'm looking my best with all the picture taking ( $33 for an organic facial, ) nails to feel like I'm armored up with pretty ( $20 at my local spot ) and a massage to free up some fear tensions ( $25 for a full hour during the early bird special 9a-1p at my favorite Emperor Leisure Spa ) which made this all so much more fun even on a budget! "Runnin' From My Roots" is a faith based film with debuts from Janelle Author of "American Idol" as the lead and Nia Sioux - also known as Nia Frasier of "Dance Moms." Lots of beautiful duets with Deanna Carter and cameos from some familiar soap stars make this movie as sweet as pie. Loved being on set because the casting director who also is the director ( Gabrielle Evans ) of our bits thanked us profusely for being there, being patient and being artists. I was literally booked off my self submission - it doesn't happen often, but it does happen guys, so don't knock doing them no matter how you may feel about them! They're the future and they're making our lives easier in ways! During this time, I only had a couple of lines to get out but during filming not only did I have to say my stuff, there was an opportunity presented when they decided to do some random rolling of the camera to get some "extra" stuff while they showed us milling about. I was asked to just talk through it since it made sense for my character being a media reporter and talk I did. I improv'd a whole bit on the spot talking to my "watchers" and guess what - not only did it make the cut, I opened the film while the other regular lines got cut. Improv guys and understand the art of acting - make sure you know who you're playing, why you're playing them and what you've got to say besides your requested lines, you never know when a chance moment will help you make it in the film. I was the last guest to walk the red carpet so although I tried to avoid some spots, I still got captured and had a great conversation with the last interviewer making the walk of dread so much fun! 🎉 Now who was the good girl and deserves that well earned celebratory din din
