The "Glamorous" Life of Auditions - Day 23 & 24 (
Auditions #27 & #28 )
I awoke to a perfect day planned over 2 weeks ago, from workout to audition to doing a Brand Ambassador job I picked up via a friend ( Terri ) whom I had worked with years ago, hoping to see her and catch up to finding out she was on vacay. That morning I lost a friend...my Buddy boy...my grumpy mcgrumpsters and although he was definitely my beast's dog, we had a very special relationship in which I'd annoy the hell out of him and for some reason he loved it, loved me for it. He passed after being rescued over 7 years later, making him the ripe age of almost 12 years old which is incredible for an English bulldog. I was told to say goodbye to my dog as I was throwing things together for my long day away in which I just stopped and cried...I already missed his clickity-clack claws dragging across the floor first thing in the morning as I would yell at him to make it to the door instead of squatting in between to relieve himself. He looked so peaceful and at ease bringing me some comfort but not much as I was trying to decide whether I should just look like a flake and cancel my whole day on a first time job given to me by a recommendation. With the Humane Society already coming out for a pickup and my beast telling me to go and keep moving for the day, I tried to do just that but already feeling off at the top of the morning. I pulled it together and was late to workout, sporadic tears, got it together to finally make a few confirming calls/texts after getting myself together for the audition with a casting director I've worked with and been called in by several times...only to be a bit late and not really in the head space of the audition. I waited, waited and waited but felt since I was already pushing it for the job, I had to get out of there instead of making it into a big deal. Asked to be seen the following week if possible and without question I was granted that. Late for the first day of work but with an hour leeway, I was able to settle and prep myself for the long day of no food ( was on the cleanse at the time ) and no more Buddy. Lucky the gal running the show was so understanding and just thankful I didn't bail at the last minute although they would've understood...maybe? Glad I didn't risk it but held it together all day by meditating when upstairs every other hour in the skybox, as I stared at the gray wall which I became known for by the end of the 3 day gig. Life happens and life goes on but through it all, I celebrated his memory of always being around to take my pokes and prods as signs of love between us. That's #2 this year...my heart hurts so I keep focused on what inspires me as well as what is important right now...they made my art better and I will continue in creating because it celebrates all that pain, love and beauty they both shared in their way to help me grow. However you cope to celebrate that doesn't hurt/harm you or your work, do that without guilt, whether it's traditional or your way...make it special, as an artist don't let "rules" hinder you from releasing all that is necessary for you to function at your upmost creative being, because that is in turn celebrating all that they gave to you....
I get the email the evening before letting me know the role I was to audition for above, has just been cast and if I could read for a different part. My mind was still reeling from the events of the week and although I felt like it was going to take some work, focus and effort on my part, I just said yes but that I may end up cold reading the new sides. I get around to looking at them briefly before bed and because it was a more emotionally engaging scene, I was able to soak all that I needed up without putting too much pressure on myself. Awoke to getting myself prepped for the day including making sure I had juices to spare for a friend who's been in the hospital for awhile dealing with a rare lung cancer whom I try to visit weekly with as much cleansing drinks as possible. Ran slightly behind with more of life weighing my energy down but I pushed through, let everyone know what I was dealing with and kept it moving forward. Audition went smoothly as I was able to take it to a different place and give 3 solid, different choices having my wonderful casting director send a note letting me know that although they were leaning towards someone else, I made her look good and she appreciated that. I couldn't be more overjoyed because I had put my push into that part and honestly didn't care regardless because I knew what I had accomplished in that room. Get it into your soul, your mind, your spirit that just because you may have worked the hell out of the piece, that you're booked...the best actor doesn't always get the job. If you go in, slay and know that you did your business with casting following up to let you know you did...take a bow, treat yo'self and know that you already know. Eventually it's gonna be all yours and because of all the work, the drive and the push you've put in over all those auditions, half your work will be golden because you already there...enjoy the journey and shine because....
Auditions like these pop up and you get to run with it...usually I'd never get the chance to play homeless because yes, there's a stereotypical look for that as well. This is why on your down time you do what you can do to develop the meaningful characters you wish to play...I do theatre so that I may get stage time and still play parts that I usually wouldn't be seen for. Got to create even more, a small bit with a homeless character with a lisp and drinking fortitude in "HOME" at ICT last year and whaddaya know, it comes back around. I'm sure I'm not the "look," right off hand but I also know this character and that gives me room to play, so let's play. Because of our issues right now, right where we are, I've taken my time to develop my mentally challenged/stroke victim etc character that took over a year of tweaks and then played around with the "crazy" homeless but have progressed into adding the elements of mental instability. This is what years of training in class, on stage, on set will get you but you've gotta push for getting to do this type of work, especially if your look doesn't fall into their idea of what the physical attributes are. Keep playing, don't get scared to fail because in that "failure" you end up creating these well rounded, true, layered characters that will one day see the light of day when given the opportunity. I keep storing 'em up, they all in my back pocket ya'll and one day we'll PLAY ON ARTIES and so don't you ever stop....
I awoke to a perfect day planned over 2 weeks ago, from workout to audition to doing a Brand Ambassador job I picked up via a friend ( Terri ) whom I had worked with years ago, hoping to see her and catch up to finding out she was on vacay. That morning I lost a friend...my Buddy boy...my grumpy mcgrumpsters and although he was definitely my beast's dog, we had a very special relationship in which I'd annoy the hell out of him and for some reason he loved it, loved me for it. He passed after being rescued over 7 years later, making him the ripe age of almost 12 years old which is incredible for an English bulldog. I was told to say goodbye to my dog as I was throwing things together for my long day away in which I just stopped and cried...I already missed his clickity-clack claws dragging across the floor first thing in the morning as I would yell at him to make it to the door instead of squatting in between to relieve himself. He looked so peaceful and at ease bringing me some comfort but not much as I was trying to decide whether I should just look like a flake and cancel my whole day on a first time job given to me by a recommendation. With the Humane Society already coming out for a pickup and my beast telling me to go and keep moving for the day, I tried to do just that but already feeling off at the top of the morning. I pulled it together and was late to workout, sporadic tears, got it together to finally make a few confirming calls/texts after getting myself together for the audition with a casting director I've worked with and been called in by several times...only to be a bit late and not really in the head space of the audition. I waited, waited and waited but felt since I was already pushing it for the job, I had to get out of there instead of making it into a big deal. Asked to be seen the following week if possible and without question I was granted that. Late for the first day of work but with an hour leeway, I was able to settle and prep myself for the long day of no food ( was on the cleanse at the time ) and no more Buddy. Lucky the gal running the show was so understanding and just thankful I didn't bail at the last minute although they would've understood...maybe? Glad I didn't risk it but held it together all day by meditating when upstairs every other hour in the skybox, as I stared at the gray wall which I became known for by the end of the 3 day gig. Life happens and life goes on but through it all, I celebrated his memory of always being around to take my pokes and prods as signs of love between us. That's #2 this year...my heart hurts so I keep focused on what inspires me as well as what is important right now...they made my art better and I will continue in creating because it celebrates all that pain, love and beauty they both shared in their way to help me grow. However you cope to celebrate that doesn't hurt/harm you or your work, do that without guilt, whether it's traditional or your way...make it special, as an artist don't let "rules" hinder you from releasing all that is necessary for you to function at your upmost creative being, because that is in turn celebrating all that they gave to you....
I get the email the evening before letting me know the role I was to audition for above, has just been cast and if I could read for a different part. My mind was still reeling from the events of the week and although I felt like it was going to take some work, focus and effort on my part, I just said yes but that I may end up cold reading the new sides. I get around to looking at them briefly before bed and because it was a more emotionally engaging scene, I was able to soak all that I needed up without putting too much pressure on myself. Awoke to getting myself prepped for the day including making sure I had juices to spare for a friend who's been in the hospital for awhile dealing with a rare lung cancer whom I try to visit weekly with as much cleansing drinks as possible. Ran slightly behind with more of life weighing my energy down but I pushed through, let everyone know what I was dealing with and kept it moving forward. Audition went smoothly as I was able to take it to a different place and give 3 solid, different choices having my wonderful casting director send a note letting me know that although they were leaning towards someone else, I made her look good and she appreciated that. I couldn't be more overjoyed because I had put my push into that part and honestly didn't care regardless because I knew what I had accomplished in that room. Get it into your soul, your mind, your spirit that just because you may have worked the hell out of the piece, that you're booked...the best actor doesn't always get the job. If you go in, slay and know that you did your business with casting following up to let you know you did...take a bow, treat yo'self and know that you already know. Eventually it's gonna be all yours and because of all the work, the drive and the push you've put in over all those auditions, half your work will be golden because you already there...enjoy the journey and shine because....
Auditions like these pop up and you get to run with it...usually I'd never get the chance to play homeless because yes, there's a stereotypical look for that as well. This is why on your down time you do what you can do to develop the meaningful characters you wish to play...I do theatre so that I may get stage time and still play parts that I usually wouldn't be seen for. Got to create even more, a small bit with a homeless character with a lisp and drinking fortitude in "HOME" at ICT last year and whaddaya know, it comes back around. I'm sure I'm not the "look," right off hand but I also know this character and that gives me room to play, so let's play. Because of our issues right now, right where we are, I've taken my time to develop my mentally challenged/stroke victim etc character that took over a year of tweaks and then played around with the "crazy" homeless but have progressed into adding the elements of mental instability. This is what years of training in class, on stage, on set will get you but you've gotta push for getting to do this type of work, especially if your look doesn't fall into their idea of what the physical attributes are. Keep playing, don't get scared to fail because in that "failure" you end up creating these well rounded, true, layered characters that will one day see the light of day when given the opportunity. I keep storing 'em up, they all in my back pocket ya'll and one day we'll PLAY ON ARTIES and so don't you ever stop.... 
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