The "Glamorous" Life of Auditions - Day 21
I love auditions...really I do. I enjoy the process, the work put in, the opportunity to show your craft. I'm not a fan of the politics but auditioning is the spice 'o life! Never lose your wonder in this process, it'll make you bitter and unproductive. This is hard, this business is tough and the odds are basically stacked against you but you can either let that be your excuse or you can shove back with all your might and roar at the idea of creating your dream to life journey. For this very reason, you must work on your craft, your push in your art and find other avenues of discovering other aspects as well. You may have come in wanting to be drama but your power lies in comedy...that could be your in, don't hide from that challenge. Or vice versa or behind the camera or being an instructor or a casting director or an agent you wish you had. Whatever the end result is, if you do it with all your might, explore all the possibilities this industry can offer, you may walk away with not only your dreams in hand, but fulfillment as well. I always felt I was a dramatic actress but as I realized how expressive I can be, I learned to capitalize on my comedic instincts naturally. I noticed when I usually booked small roles here and there, it was more on the side of comedy so although I haven't been to the big schools like Groundlings, UCB or Second City, I made sure to play in my classes and not lean into my comfort zone. I don't believe you need "comedy" classes to be comedic but you do need an instructor who does understand the timing of such work in order to push another facet of your work. Hopefully you're in a place that does both, if not, push for both and give yourself creative freedom to work both because you never know what you may end up booking the most or why. I know I've got the gift of a "serious/dramatic" actress but I have this silly side to me that is guarded for only people close to me, when I realized I could use that, pushed to use that by my beast and fill my art well even more, I took advantage of that knowing more opportunities would come because of it. Comedy is hard, challenging and focused with timing but if you can wrap your head around it, you may open yourself up to other fantastical possibilities. Don't cut yourself off from exploring everything you possibly can while on this journey, you've got the time, do it now...work your art now so that every time you've got a chance to show case your shine, you do it confidently in all of your majestic being. I love both, I want it all and hence the reason I don't shy away from theatre in the process as well. Another audition for ICT in their production of "Doubt" as Mrs. Muller...a role I've had my eye on but I'm also understanding because I'm in another play while this one goes into rehearsals and I'm also AEA now and since it's a smaller role, it's out of my hands. Getting to do it was worth it all and even though it was in the midst of me shooting a show and racing to rehearsals, this audition fell right in line that it was too perfect of an opportunity for me to let slide (although my hair wasn't what I wanted it to be - had fake blood in it the night before, bags under my eyes from the shoot and feelings of tiredness) because sometimes I do auditions not needing to book them now but to play so that when it comes up later (and this will come back up later), I can kill that as well - when it's yours, it will be yours and I claim that someday, I'll get this particular role. Someone will give me the opportunity regardless of how it's been done, who's done it and whatever preconceived notions they may have, I'll get a shot to do it and I will do it gladly. I remember doing this in class years ago, with Sharon Spence of Lifebook and we worked that scene so much it all came back quickly when I had little time to really dig in. What a joy to read for the Artistic Director again who helped give me a shot in "Flyin' West" and a casting director that has brought me in and keeps bringing me in regardless of the situation at hand. I decided I wanted a southern accent on her to lean away from any comparisons recently although set in NY '64. Make choices, stick by them and have a reason if asked, they'll respect that when questioning but I didn't get that...I got tears in the eyes of the people I'm proud to know and walked out of there knowing I did what I wanted to do. Every chance I can get to see Michael Donovan I take because I want him to see my consistent work ethic as well as my range. I know most of the stuff may not be for me because of various reasons but I also know he takes pride in knowing he can call me in now. Go in, make your mark like only you can and leave. Don't let all the excuses you can give yourself hold you back on stamping your mark in the room, they won't be able to change, make different choices or give you a shot if you hurt yourself by not going in the first place. Change your outlook first, doing that will eventually change theirs...GO DO THAT!!! I didn't get this role but I just found out that another actress I know has booked it (which I love knowing someone that I know got it), congrats Tamika and I can't wait to see you do your thang up there!!!
I raced from that audition to my rehearsals (make sure to stop and appreciate the flowers) for Shakespeare which have been my life for the past few weeks. I've felt I haven't had a firm holding on the ground but I'm so excited to have completed a project that I will forever hold dear in my heart. I love that I've gotten these opportunities out of the blue to be a part of productions that I've never had a chance before on because this is what's keeping me inspired and on my toes about what kind of actress I want to become. I've said yes to as many things I could possibly do without driving myself mad and I've turned down just as many because I'm already pushed to my max but boy am I ever so happy to have leaned into my work and said yes instead of no to some of these projects happening now. I got to work on my first ever re-enactment show as a lead with 6 days of work, pages of dialogue and unscripted improv along with aging/fun make-up. I've never worked like this before and pushing my art to another level just allowed it to all sink in...I'm doing what I've been dreaming to do. All those classes I could barely afford, pictures needed to be taken and then more money spent to put them up on sites, collecting and putting together reels and getting clothes to up my audition factor as well as spending money just to get to and from said auditions with no guarantee of a job, even creating, writing and being the lead in my own short - whew. All worth it to play this role, to get a chance to really push the envelope in my training and stamina as well as peak my curiosity in other genres of acting as well - soap operas here I come...maybe, if you'll have me - HA! I was able to shoot at different locations and get to know the this cast/crew as well, which was nothing short of amazing. Understand I was given this opportunity by someone that watched me do comedy on another set, someone I had no clue that was watching me, someone that would later be the defining factor on giving me this chance to shine. You never know who is watching you on set, what they may be doing next, what they're trying to accomplish as well and that they may want to include you. Had to mention this because one of the characters was an actor that's been around, although I've never heard of him I started getting e-mails recently about him being in this and that, doing stand up etc so to put a face with a name was exciting for me. I watched as he had this aggressive body language as well as a gruffness when speaking to certain people on the production...I watched the reactions of the people on set and cringed as he was either oblivious or so full of himself because that was who he is. He spoke to some with kindness but if he didn't know who you were, he was going to make you realize he was the "actor" on set. Watching all this, knowing how wonderful each and every person was on this set working and how truly lucky I was to be surrounded by this type of cast/crew, I just made a mental note as I'm sure all of them did, to not support nor recommend this person for anything. It was amazing seeing this flippant behavior on a truly wonderful set, filled with hard working, humble people that were just out to make a show. I've always said, money nor fame doesn't make someone a jerk...money/fame brings what is already there out more so. You can act like this person if you so choose to do so, but do not blame anyone else when they don't want to work with you again or may have not so good words when someone they know wants to hire you. Always leave the set with everyone wanting to work with you again...including the PA's...they're on set for a reason as well guys. Know that everyone there is there to make a project happen, you are not the end all be all, you are a part of the picture do not become the problem...they've had to deal with those long before you and will have to continue it long after you're gone. No one is beneath you in this project, nor are they above - everyone must contribute in order to make this happen so leave all that unnecessary extra stuff at home because trust me when I say, I watch and I talk when needed. It's rare that I get to recommend but I will quickly throw a name under the bus if I've watched you demean people on a set especially when uncalled for and that includes passive-aggressive behavior. When I say everyone was ridiculously wonderful on this set, I mean it! If you ever see any of these faces on set, know you're in good hands and you will get the chance to play like the artist you are and they will make you look good for doing so. Even after your last camera day, when you are wrapped, they call you on set and cheer for you - how awesome is that! Aundrea Posey, thank you ever so much for introducing me to such a fantastic opportunity as well as one of the most amazing sets I've ever had the chance to work thus far. Thank you for believing in my work without having to see it all before stepping foot on your set, introducing me to the director Greg who made me feel safe to work and allowed me free reigns to just go and be, was one of the most freeing/rewarding aspects of this shoot. You guys make my art easy to do...all that trust given to me was beautious for my soul and I will never forget...I can't wait to work with each and every one of you all again. You guys made my long days easy, can't thank you enough for this experience given - thanks for making my face look good/bad when needed to the adventurous make up dept., props for always caring what I looked like, electrical/dp/gaffing/camera for making me look wonderful on film, the sound dept for making sure my voice was heard, wardrobe for pushing my look and jokingly called me out when asked to keep the sweater on, I found a way to take it off during the shot because it was too damn hot but you respected my choices anyway. Hope you all enjoyed my home made sugar scrub and if I missed you this time, I won't the next! These type of sets come far and few so appreciate them when they do come, people are watching and I am ever so happy I was able to share this experience with another actor I had the chance to recommend and he didn't disappoint! You never know where your opportunities lie nor where they will come from, don't crush them before you can squeeze more out of them!!! Regardless of the set, be the person you want people to be to you and you will create the happiness you're so chasing after...BE THE REAL, BEAUTIFUL YOU and the opportunities will keep coming!
I love auditions...really I do. I enjoy the process, the work put in, the opportunity to show your craft. I'm not a fan of the politics but auditioning is the spice 'o life! Never lose your wonder in this process, it'll make you bitter and unproductive. This is hard, this business is tough and the odds are basically stacked against you but you can either let that be your excuse or you can shove back with all your might and roar at the idea of creating your dream to life journey. For this very reason, you must work on your craft, your push in your art and find other avenues of discovering other aspects as well. You may have come in wanting to be drama but your power lies in comedy...that could be your in, don't hide from that challenge. Or vice versa or behind the camera or being an instructor or a casting director or an agent you wish you had. Whatever the end result is, if you do it with all your might, explore all the possibilities this industry can offer, you may walk away with not only your dreams in hand, but fulfillment as well. I always felt I was a dramatic actress but as I realized how expressive I can be, I learned to capitalize on my comedic instincts naturally. I noticed when I usually booked small roles here and there, it was more on the side of comedy so although I haven't been to the big schools like Groundlings, UCB or Second City, I made sure to play in my classes and not lean into my comfort zone. I don't believe you need "comedy" classes to be comedic but you do need an instructor who does understand the timing of such work in order to push another facet of your work. Hopefully you're in a place that does both, if not, push for both and give yourself creative freedom to work both because you never know what you may end up booking the most or why. I know I've got the gift of a "serious/dramatic" actress but I have this silly side to me that is guarded for only people close to me, when I realized I could use that, pushed to use that by my beast and fill my art well even more, I took advantage of that knowing more opportunities would come because of it. Comedy is hard, challenging and focused with timing but if you can wrap your head around it, you may open yourself up to other fantastical possibilities. Don't cut yourself off from exploring everything you possibly can while on this journey, you've got the time, do it now...work your art now so that every time you've got a chance to show case your shine, you do it confidently in all of your majestic being. I love both, I want it all and hence the reason I don't shy away from theatre in the process as well. Another audition for ICT in their production of "Doubt" as Mrs. Muller...a role I've had my eye on but I'm also understanding because I'm in another play while this one goes into rehearsals and I'm also AEA now and since it's a smaller role, it's out of my hands. Getting to do it was worth it all and even though it was in the midst of me shooting a show and racing to rehearsals, this audition fell right in line that it was too perfect of an opportunity for me to let slide (although my hair wasn't what I wanted it to be - had fake blood in it the night before, bags under my eyes from the shoot and feelings of tiredness) because sometimes I do auditions not needing to book them now but to play so that when it comes up later (and this will come back up later), I can kill that as well - when it's yours, it will be yours and I claim that someday, I'll get this particular role. Someone will give me the opportunity regardless of how it's been done, who's done it and whatever preconceived notions they may have, I'll get a shot to do it and I will do it gladly. I remember doing this in class years ago, with Sharon Spence of Lifebook and we worked that scene so much it all came back quickly when I had little time to really dig in. What a joy to read for the Artistic Director again who helped give me a shot in "Flyin' West" and a casting director that has brought me in and keeps bringing me in regardless of the situation at hand. I decided I wanted a southern accent on her to lean away from any comparisons recently although set in NY '64. Make choices, stick by them and have a reason if asked, they'll respect that when questioning but I didn't get that...I got tears in the eyes of the people I'm proud to know and walked out of there knowing I did what I wanted to do. Every chance I can get to see Michael Donovan I take because I want him to see my consistent work ethic as well as my range. I know most of the stuff may not be for me because of various reasons but I also know he takes pride in knowing he can call me in now. Go in, make your mark like only you can and leave. Don't let all the excuses you can give yourself hold you back on stamping your mark in the room, they won't be able to change, make different choices or give you a shot if you hurt yourself by not going in the first place. Change your outlook first, doing that will eventually change theirs...GO DO THAT!!! I didn't get this role but I just found out that another actress I know has booked it (which I love knowing someone that I know got it), congrats Tamika and I can't wait to see you do your thang up there!!! 
I raced from that audition to my rehearsals (make sure to stop and appreciate the flowers) for Shakespeare which have been my life for the past few weeks. I've felt I haven't had a firm holding on the ground but I'm so excited to have completed a project that I will forever hold dear in my heart. I love that I've gotten these opportunities out of the blue to be a part of productions that I've never had a chance before on because this is what's keeping me inspired and on my toes about what kind of actress I want to become. I've said yes to as many things I could possibly do without driving myself mad and I've turned down just as many because I'm already pushed to my max but boy am I ever so happy to have leaned into my work and said yes instead of no to some of these projects happening now. I got to work on my first ever re-enactment show as a lead with 6 days of work, pages of dialogue and unscripted improv along with aging/fun make-up. I've never worked like this before and pushing my art to another level just allowed it to all sink in...I'm doing what I've been dreaming to do. All those classes I could barely afford, pictures needed to be taken and then more money spent to put them up on sites, collecting and putting together reels and getting clothes to up my audition factor as well as spending money just to get to and from said auditions with no guarantee of a job, even creating, writing and being the lead in my own short - whew. All worth it to play this role, to get a chance to really push the envelope in my training and stamina as well as peak my curiosity in other genres of acting as well - soap operas here I come...maybe, if you'll have me - HA! I was able to shoot at different locations and get to know the this cast/crew as well, which was nothing short of amazing. Understand I was given this opportunity by someone that watched me do comedy on another set, someone I had no clue that was watching me, someone that would later be the defining factor on giving me this chance to shine. You never know who is watching you on set, what they may be doing next, what they're trying to accomplish as well and that they may want to include you. Had to mention this because one of the characters was an actor that's been around, although I've never heard of him I started getting e-mails recently about him being in this and that, doing stand up etc so to put a face with a name was exciting for me. I watched as he had this aggressive body language as well as a gruffness when speaking to certain people on the production...I watched the reactions of the people on set and cringed as he was either oblivious or so full of himself because that was who he is. He spoke to some with kindness but if he didn't know who you were, he was going to make you realize he was the "actor" on set. Watching all this, knowing how wonderful each and every person was on this set working and how truly lucky I was to be surrounded by this type of cast/crew, I just made a mental note as I'm sure all of them did, to not support nor recommend this person for anything. It was amazing seeing this flippant behavior on a truly wonderful set, filled with hard working, humble people that were just out to make a show. I've always said, money nor fame doesn't make someone a jerk...money/fame brings what is already there out more so. You can act like this person if you so choose to do so, but do not blame anyone else when they don't want to work with you again or may have not so good words when someone they know wants to hire you. Always leave the set with everyone wanting to work with you again...including the PA's...they're on set for a reason as well guys. Know that everyone there is there to make a project happen, you are not the end all be all, you are a part of the picture do not become the problem...they've had to deal with those long before you and will have to continue it long after you're gone. No one is beneath you in this project, nor are they above - everyone must contribute in order to make this happen so leave all that unnecessary extra stuff at home because trust me when I say, I watch and I talk when needed. It's rare that I get to recommend but I will quickly throw a name under the bus if I've watched you demean people on a set especially when uncalled for and that includes passive-aggressive behavior. When I say everyone was ridiculously wonderful on this set, I mean it! If you ever see any of these faces on set, know you're in good hands and you will get the chance to play like the artist you are and they will make you look good for doing so. Even after your last camera day, when you are wrapped, they call you on set and cheer for you - how awesome is that! Aundrea Posey, thank you ever so much for introducing me to such a fantastic opportunity as well as one of the most amazing sets I've ever had the chance to work thus far. Thank you for believing in my work without having to see it all before stepping foot on your set, introducing me to the director Greg who made me feel safe to work and allowed me free reigns to just go and be, was one of the most freeing/rewarding aspects of this shoot. You guys make my art easy to do...all that trust given to me was beautious for my soul and I will never forget...I can't wait to work with each and every one of you all again. You guys made my long days easy, can't thank you enough for this experience given - thanks for making my face look good/bad when needed to the adventurous make up dept., props for always caring what I looked like, electrical/dp/gaffing/camera for making me look wonderful on film, the sound dept for making sure my voice was heard, wardrobe for pushing my look and jokingly called me out when asked to keep the sweater on, I found a way to take it off during the shot because it was too damn hot but you respected my choices anyway. Hope you all enjoyed my home made sugar scrub and if I missed you this time, I won't the next! These type of sets come far and few so appreciate them when they do come, people are watching and I am ever so happy I was able to share this experience with another actor I had the chance to recommend and he didn't disappoint! You never know where your opportunities lie nor where they will come from, don't crush them before you can squeeze more out of them!!! Regardless of the set, be the person you want people to be to you and you will create the happiness you're so chasing after...BE THE REAL, BEAUTIFUL YOU and the opportunities will keep coming!
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